Effective leadership and success in business depend, in part, on your ability to develop your interpersonal relationships, both deep and lasting relationships and social and short-term ones. Now, how well do we know how to handle this facet with all the people with whom we interact?
Ideally, anyone should be able to participate in a pleasant chat at the office, with colleagues and clients, and get along with others. If this would be the ideal but very often it only occurs with certain people and with others, there is no harmonious relationship.
Usually, others give us clues that tell us what we have to say to connect with them.
I list below some " rules of social interaction " that may be useful to you on a daily basis.
The 7 tips
1. Acknowledge the presence of others. Always say hello or nod to anyone who talks to you. (In fact, try talking to them first!) Never walk past someone without smiling or acknowledging or acknowledging their presence;
There is no room in the organization for rudeness, and it certainly won't get you anywhere.
2. Start the conversation. Talk to any stranger who is sitting or standing near you at any time. Don't expect others to speak first. Share some personal events about yourself and ask the other person about their life. Practice until you feel comfortable doing this.
3. Keep the conversation going. Try to find something that interests you about the other person and talk about it. "Do you live in the southern part of the city? I went to a school in that area ”. Observe that person and focus on all the details with curiosity, but eliminate value judgments.
4. Attunement. I mean the act of reflecting on the other person's nonverbal cues, as well as their general emotional state. It is based on empathy, the ability to internally imitate another person's feelings. Allow your body and face to show interest, depending on what you are discussing. Synchronized non-verbal behaviors, such as doing what someone else is doing (crossing your legs, moving your hands…) or bowing and smiling, facilitates the exchange of emotions and allows you to better interpret the feelings of others.
I'm not talking about "tuning in to the other person for your own benefit." This is called manipulation. To create effective relationships, it is imperative to demonstrate genuine interest and a desire to connect with them.
5. Synchronization. It is a form of recognition of the other person before diverting the conversation in another direction. The best way to do this would be to summarize in one or two sentences what you think that person has said; This way she will know that you have paid attention to her and she will be more willing to change the subject and discuss the problem you are proposing.
For example, if two of your co-workers are talking about Sunday's soccer game and you want to discuss or comment on a project with one of them, make a couple of comments about the game or ask a question if you don't watch it. Then say, "Alberto, I need to talk to you about the project's agenda." Alberto will probably be more willing to discuss your topic because you have recognized the importance of his.
If we use attunement and synchronization to connect with others, they will be more receptive to our opinions and feelings. It is the basis of persuasion and influence.
6. Join the conversation the right way. Waiting for the right moment is key in social interactions. Never interrupt another person to join another conversation: people resent the impositions in a conversation and will often ignore what you say. First listen for a few minutes and use your non-verbal language to synchronize yourself (body posture, gaze…). Normally someone will see you and recognize your presence. You can also wait for them to pause the conversation, but be sure to ask a question or offer a comment on what others are talking about before trying to move the conversation in the direction you want.
7. Spread your mood to others. If you want others to adopt your state of mind or the type of relationship you prefer, first you have to show empathy and synchronize with them.
Self-opening is also helpful, because if you reveal your own preferences and feelings, you will be helping others see your own perspective, even if they disagree with you.
Qualified leaders (and this applies to everyone) know that they sometimes have to share their own ideas and feelings before asking others to do so. When you are open-minded, others are more willing to collaborate and be persuaded.
These and other "skills" that will be very useful to build successful relationships with your clients, coworkers or with any other person with whom you interact. You can learn them today with any of our Productivity & Personal Excellence or 'Automatic Locks' courses and trainings. Act Now !!! It is time, don't you think? !!!
