Three friends are reunited tasting a “bourbon” accompanied by select delicacies with total unconcern for the potential effect on their figures, but the reason justifies it.
The most pleasant and gratifying moments of recent times are happening. Especially one of them. They are starring in a brainstorm.
An exuberant flow of evil ideas, uncensored, a feast of wild fantasies that transport them to nirvana, the total happiness derived from the feeling of possessing infinite power.
The reason for such satisfaction is the planning of an atrocious, anonymous, unpunished and definitive revenge against an unmentionable and disgusting element who happened to be the husband of one of them.
The reptile was discovered by the betrayed lying in the conjugal thalamus itself with a co-worker. The scene might recall the club of the first wives.
Daydreams are not subject to the norms of morality, they are the most spontaneous and free manifestation of the human mind.
Nothing is forbidden and nothing is dishonest. Why not abandon yourself to the chimeras of revenge and enjoy the honeys of imaginary power?
Rabies is a natural emotion
You have to accept reality: rabies is a normal fact of life. The world is overflowing with violence, hatred, revenge, war and aggression. Many theories of human development are based on the child's struggle with her anger and frustration and the primary fantasies of aggression and guilt. As a result, some people are always angry, while others are unaware of their inner rage.
The reluctance to admit that you feel angry is caused by a certain shame about that emotion. From childhood we were taught that the expression of anger was condemnable in society.
But the truth is that it is one emotion like another. Like feeling thirsty, anger responds to a physiological response at any given time. Anger comes from the perception that our well-being is threatened or that our expectations are frustrated in some way. The body automatically responds by preparing for the fight. In the depth of our beliefs, this emotion comes from seeing our sense of justice and righteousness violated.
Anger starts from the wounds.
Being aware that anger comes from frustration, acknowledging and naming it can prevent dark and unmentionable feelings and behaviors like prejudice, hatred, selfishness, sexual abuse and domestic violence, and illnesses like addictions and depression. Thus, the recognition of one's feelings of anger can be much healthier than the suppression of this emotion "so that there is peace."
Finding out the wounds of the past is something unavoidable to heal them. Because if the old wound is not found, any present wound remembers and deepens the previous one and the anger is activated and flares up.
The desire for revenge
What is revenge? The natural instinctive response to the insult and offense that makes the person feel "tied" with who attacked. The world teaches us this answer from a young age. Society is full of models of revenge. President Bush addresses us, passive spectators of his foreign policy, speaking to us about the crusade against terror and about the "lessons" that he must give to the "enemy".
Getting out of this natural path of defense is all about learning empathy and forgiveness.
The Judeo-Christian tradition has always preached forgiveness. Currently the concept of forgiveness has been absorbed by researchers of the mind as a therapeutic resource to mitigate human suffering. Although the revenge fantasies are something primitive and childish in us, we would have to be aware that pain and hatred are often fused and learn to "purge" ourselves of this toxicity. Know that they are residual reactions of our childhood insecurity.
Certain people feel hurt only immerse themselves in revenge fantasies, while others practice acts of revenge and violence. There should be a healthier response that is, at the same time, honest with ourselves.
The vengeful's personality traits.
Neuroticism: These people experience negative emotions, mood instability, and a high sensitivity to adverse events. They have an unlimited predisposition to feel offended and angry.
They show a low profile of friendliness. Kindness is made up of qualities like altruism, being nice and trustworthy. They usually have conflicts with peers and difficulties for closeness in relationships and commitments. Likewise, their capacity for empathy is low.
They tend to ruminate on offenses with the intention of keeping them well in mind. The idea of constantly meditating on these allows them to remember their objectives of "balancing the scales", "giving the offender a lesson" or "saving dignity". The rumination tendency is strongly associated with the inability to forgive and they are highly defensive against attacks on their fragile self-esteem.
Repetitive thinking about offenses in vengeful people, ironically, does not dissipate their discomfort, but perpetuates it.
Ideas and beliefs of the vengeful.
"Balance the balance": The vengeful person may even think that his procedure is moral. They seek justice.
"Give the aggressor a lesson": make him see that he will not tolerate another offense and that the aggressor will not go unpunished. In this case the moral / educational function of revenge is directed directly at the aggressor.
“Save dignity”: This idea aims to demonstrate to the aggressor and to all witnesses to the aggression, that he is a person who will not be overwhelmed and that he has his own worth and dignity.
The healing power of forgiveness.
The two classic human responses to aggression have been revenge and withdrawal. These very natural reactions can have very negative consequences for the health of individuals, their relationships, and for society in general. While there is talk of the sweet taste of revenge, there is currently plenty of evidence that the consequences of knowing how to forgive are much more beneficial in the long run. The benefits of forgiveness were widely preached by different religions, but only recently has psychology given it due attention.
Researchers such as the American psychologist Michael E. McCullough devoted themselves to studying the personality of the vengeful, the processes necessary to forgive and the skills required for that, and, more recently, the healthy effects derived from the fact of forgiving. This psychologist affirms that knowing how to forgive can improve the quality of life, blood pressure, the immune system and prevent depression and anxiety.
Forgiveness, in psychological terms, is defined as a reduction in the motivation to harm the aggressor (or in the relationship with the aggressor) and, simultaneously, an increase in the motivation to act favorably for the aggressor (or in the relationship with the aggressor). aggressor).
A new age.
It would be encouraging if these studies on forgiveness and revenge had a greater influence on human interaction. Knowing that harmony in our world could develop thanks to learning forgiveness could give us a glimpse of a new era in relationships between people.
