When you start something new, the ideal and what you want the most is that everything goes well and that you achieve the goal you have set for yourself. We all start with that illusion, of course, and we do whatever it takes to make things work, but what happens when they don't.
Many times, no matter how much enthusiasm and effort you put in, things do not go well and, either due to a bad decision (as a reader told me the other day) or because you insist on something that is nothing more than a dead weight, you It's time to abandon ship and start from scratch. Then what?
Your next step will depend on the type of situation you are in at the moment. With which of these three do you identify ?:
1. You have been completely blocked and do not know what to do
You have never stopped to consider other alternatives, you always do your thing and so happy and now that you find yourself without it, you don't know what to do. If this is your case, you have to work introspection, as I mentioned in another article, to reconsider what you want in life, what you like to do, what you are good at or people ask of you. That is the first step. It's not easy, so the sooner you start the better. You can try it on your own, look for a book or hire someone to help you, whatever it takes to get out of that state of anguish and blockage.
But you know what is best, to avoid reaching that situation. How? Not waiting for something like this to happen to find out what other things you like. Thus, if at any time you have to start from scratch, you will be afraid and you will have a hard time but at least you will know that you have options. Start experimenting and trying other things to see what you like. For example, I did the hobby coaching course and look where I am now.
A very useful and sometimes very difficult exercise is to think if there were five parallel universes in which you could not dedicate yourself to what you do now, what would you do? Now I have it clear but when I was a scientist, no! I couldn't imagine doing anything else, I thought I didn't like anything else, until I started taking courses and trying…
2. You are discouraged and exhausted but at least you know what you want to do next.
In this case, the question is to get going again without being sabotaged by fears and doubts. Regain strength (taking a vacation if necessary), remember the lessons learned, and get to work again.
When I decided to change my scientific coaching business in Canada, it was very difficult because I was very attached to my idea and did not listen to my mentors. In the end I had to admit that I had to start over, with resignation and impatience because I had invested time, enthusiasm, money and I did not feel like having to start over, nothing! But what other option do you have? Stay protesting and denying? Nothing of that, I took a vacation and took the opportunity to move to Spain and settle in Valencia while reorganizing ideas and starting over.
It was not easy at all and even less for an impatient chronic like me, who want results now, but this time things went much faster because I already knew what to avoid and had learned a lot from the previous experience, so in three months I already had better results than in the entire previous year. Every cloud has a silver lining.
3. You know what you want but you have run out of resources, with one hand in front and one behind
In this case, if you already know what you want and are determined to get it, what do you need? Find resources, so be creative and be patient. Sometimes you can ask for loans or help to acquaintances, but other times you will have to tighten your belt and save, or find a second job to pay for your expenses. It's not easy, now, if it were, everyone would be a billionaire and would do whatever they wanted. But if that is your situation that is the sacrifice.
The question is, do you really want what you say you want? If so, you will be willing to do whatever it takes and you will be aware that sacrifice is only part of the way. If not, you will make 500,000 excuses and you will only be able to focus on the sacrifice, not the process and the result you want to achieve. There it depends on you.
In itself the decision to leave is very hard, especially if it is something you have worked a lot on or have put a lot of enthusiasm and resources into; And starting over can be uphill. In any case, the most important thing about this experience is to accept that you did the best you could according to your circumstances, that it was a setback and a lesson, and take the time you need to reflect, regain your strength and start over.
