All human activity is based on the interrelation between individuals. Each company, each project depends on more than one person. We will always have to interact with others and it is the quality of these relationships, their correct approach that guarantees the success of our vision. On the contrary, poor relationships inevitably lead to failure.
On the other hand, when undertaking in the business world, our relationships with others are inevitably affected. Sometimes positively and many times negatively.
When I started my business, I had the false illusion that clients would come to me for my personal qualities, academic preparation, reputation, seriousness, honesty and experience in the field. After two years I realized that it is the healthy relationships and not the skills that create loyalty in customers, suppliers, employees, partners, etc.
It is not a kind of emotional “manipulation”, nor of feigning affection to win a sale, it is about effectively identifying the level and depth at which we can interact with people so that each contact is a gain for all.
I say this because I was always afraid of becoming a kind of circus clown with a smile hanging on my face and making people believe that I like them when they probably are not. The smile comes not from the need to please people but from self-confidence.
The moment we begin to value ourselves fairly, we begin to value others and this allows us to relate to everyone from a genuine starting point of liking, respect, interest and love that is liking, respect, interest and love for ourselves.
Yes, it all starts within us. The moment we experience this self transformation we begin to have positive results in our environment.
Respect
I think the first step in developing good relationships is respect. I once heard in an audio book that: the value of a human being is unique and invariable. Therefore, it is not defined by what it does or does not do, much less by our perception of others. You have to respect the opinions of others, their decisions, their tastes, etc. we should never impose our criteria
Resist the temptation to have a bad opinion of others
It is a difficult task for many, but there is no better practice than reserving negative opinions from others. Everyone has their defects and virtues, we are all growing and therefore no one has the authority to judge others on their decisions. According to John C. Maxuell in his book.
"Relations 101", US President Harry Truman said: "When we understand the other's point of view, when we understand what he is trying to do, nine times out of ten that person is trying to do the right thing."
Indeed, we all try to do the right thing. It does not mean that we are doing it, we must determine what is the right thing that others try to do when they are wrong.
Avoid prejudice
How is it possible that we pretend to know people before treating them, or by the way they dress or speak, or by the people they meet. Our past experiences are useful to prevent us from making the same mistakes but they are a hindrance to promote healthy relationships with others. If we consider ourselves to be good and do not deserve to be judged before we meet, we must be fair and apply this principle to others as well.
The service
Serving is our cover letter. For this, we need to identify what our strengths and weaknesses are. What we have access to and what we don't. Because serving does not mean creating false expectations about things that we can achieve or do for others.
A seller, for example, focused on closing a deal, can offer the customer certain favors. This is a serious mistake because some customers realize the seller's intentions and make the most of these circumstances, but never buy any of their products or services.
Serving is a genuine act of solidarity with the real needs of our clients and towards this we must direct the goods that we commercialize.
The inner circle
John C. Maxuell in his book "the 21 irrefutable laws of leadership" talks about forming an "inner circle" each person, according to Maxuell must have a group of close collaborators in different areas that we can not work alone. He recommends that we have someone who intercedes, someone who listens, someone who encourages, etc.
What strikes me about this recommendation by Mr. Maxuell is that as we form this circle, we are really creating deep ties with at least 15 people who will accompany us on the path of personal and professional growth.
To carry out large projects we need people committed to our vision by our side. But those people do not commit to us just because. It is the relationships that we create with them that encourage their collaboration and above all allow them to help us grow and be better people. And it is being better people, not better salesmen, or better engineers, or better doctors, being better people is the key to true success in life.
