The behavior of each one of us when consuming food at the table clearly exhibits, beyond imagining, our education, style and development and, consequently, can generate a negative impression on our interlocutors.
Currently, this issue has been massively oriented, in an elitist and sectarian way, aimed at ladies and young girls eager to create a good social image. At the business level, business breakfasts, lunches and lunches are frequent and also in the personnel selection processes.
The label on the table offers interesting guidelines and advice on the kitchenware, the postures, the locations of the diners and a host of valuable details aimed at making an evening enjoyable. Similarly, it is related to self-esteem, culture and social ability; aspects evaded by the memory instructors "pipiris nais" -which abound like mushrooms in institutes, academies and educational entities- that circumscribe the social label in three topics: makeup, clothing and cutlery.
The social label demands the will to practice certain guidelines and internalize them with constancy, naturalness and fluency. Only their continuous application will facilitate that they form part of their daily performance. Otherwise, when you try to show off your knowledge, you will be stiff, nervous and indecisive. In short, it must be assumed as a culture of life.
A painful custom that has ceased to attract attention is related to people who demand to place themselves next to their best friend or spouse. Women love to “save room” by placing their wallets on the adjacent chairs for their brotherhood, with which, apparently, they can only talk about their domesticities. Please note: A married couple, two ladies, two gentlemen, two feuding subjects or two neighbors who do not speak the same language do not sit together. This sticky routine of forming infallible lodges restricts the rapprochement between the participants and, in addition, makes visible the lack of socialization and interpersonal intelligence. A meeting at the table seeks to integrate the attendees.
Si acude a un banquete en el que han sido colocados letreros con los nombres de los asistentes en la mesa, esquive la infeliz ocurrencia de cambiar los rótulos con la finalidad de coincidir con su esposa o novia, como sucede con asiduidad en “perulandia”. Es curioso percibir a señoras y señores con huérfanas capacidades para alternar con invitados desconocidos, a pesar de su elevado estatus profesional. Una vez más, podemos aseverar que existen innumerables prójimos, incluyendo incontrastables “pipiris nais”, parecidos a un libro con pasta de cuero, letras de oro y páginas en blanco.
On the other hand, I want to refer to the fantastic cell phone that profuse subjects like to flaunt as a synonym of economic boom. Although, unfortunately, they cannot show the same level of intellectual, cultural and spiritual preparation. Remember: it is not a fork, and therefore refuse to put it on the table as I warn at lunches in offices and homes. It is annoying to watch chatting on your mobile device without caring about the discomfort that the attendees generate. This indicates the non-existence of relevance in an environment invaded by proliferating bad forms.
The selfies to their lush food dishes to show them on Facebook are not wise either. Many people avoid the realization that they project the sensation of one afflicted by the contagious syndrome of “chuncholandia”, who has never seen a pleasant and well-decorated dish, nor has he attended a restaurant with five forks. Use relevance: If you want to take pictures of those present, ask the host for permission.
Avoid sitting at the table if you are afflicted by any illness, only make a general greeting if you arrive when the guests are in their seats, avoid questioning the person who declines to drink liquor, refuse to ask about the price of the ingested or pretend to find out the recipe for the porridge offered, do not leave unless it is urgent, start eating when the host begins to do so, disregard comments about the portion of food served, and remember: women sit first and men sit next.
The host must consult his diner, when making the invitation, if he has an impediment to enjoy some type of menu. It must also be ready in advance; Although it is redundant that when the guests arrive, the homeowners are still enlisting. Do not delay the time to go to the dining room because several attendees "are on the way", unless they have warned and it is an informal meeting. If an attendant comes when you are eating the main course or dessert, serve what the guests are savoring. Avoid the ordinary routine of offering the entrance, the main course, etc.
Never be accompanied by a personal invitation. In "perulandia" it is frequent to carry lovers or friends without these having been called. In case the invitation is with a partner, do not carry your children and, also, do not call to ask for "permission" to go with family. Prudence is synonymous with elegance.
The famous toast is made by the host and will be brief in his speech. Diners can drink as many times as they want without waiting for another toast. In “perulandia” they usually provide people who are eager to drink liquor at all times and for whatever reason. If you are served a drink of your displeasure or that you are unable to consume, you will accept it and only pretend to toast. But, you will not bother the host by rejecting the glass, nor by implying that you want more alcohol.
In the same way, I want to reiterate what was explained in my article “And at the table… Good manners?”: “… Sometimes I meet relatives who love to use the expression 'we are confident' in order to justify their wrong behavior or protect more than one fault. For example, place a damaged tableware, expose a dirty tablecloth, put paper towels instead of napkins, put a plastic mat on the tablecloth (so as not to 'stain it'), ask us to keep the cutlery at the entrance to use with the second course, stretching your arms to serve the chili or placing a two-liter bottle of soda - which will hinder visibility among diners - among other crazy and offensive actions. Strive to always show (even in your private activity) a well-installed table, neat and in top condition.This will speak to their self-esteem. "
Please do not appeal to the degree of intimacy between the guests to proceed to serve the salt with your hand, make wild jokes, take the meat from the source with your fork and knife. No matter how rich the bite is, avoid sucking your fingers and cleaning your teeth with your tongue, toothpicks or nails. Food is brought to the mouth and not the mouth to delicacies; only slightly inclined. When coughing or sneezing, use the handkerchief quietly. However, living in "perulandia" apply with care and discernment your "common sense."
If you expect to be summoned to social activities, have the purpose of apologizing if you cannot attend, assume correct conduct in the acts to which you attend, thank the attentions received in the following days through a phone call, and also be gentle to reward the entertainments. In innumerable opportunities we perceive subjects who long to be invited to as many events as possible, despite the fact that the offered deferences do not correspond. This is typical in a society overwhelmed with discourtesies, indolence, arrogance and folly. Let us make an effort to preach by the example of our actions and propagate seeds tending to incite the consciences of our fellow men.
To finish: bring a bottle of wine or a sweet to share; it will be an exalting detail. Make your meetings at the table a wonderful opportunity to strengthen new ties, meet human beings, promote pleasant conversations and strengthen your ties. To the extent that you have mastery, spontaneity, erudition and self-belief, you will be able to enjoy each day with your family, friends and colleagues.
(*) Teacher, consultant in event organization, protocol, professional image and social etiquette.
