When possessiveness exists in the couple, either in one or both members, it has a very high risk that the relationship will be greatly weakened in a short period of time, sometimes even completely destroying itself. Possessiveness is an extremely negative attitude that tells us that in the person who suffers it there is enormous insecurity and a high degree of dissatisfaction with herself and therefore in her relationship with her partner. When we have the feeling that our partner is adopting this type of attitude with us, it is because we obviously feel that something in the relationship is wrong and we do not feel comfortable with the attitude of the other. To know how to identify when our partner is being possessive and to be fully sure of it,we can take into account some of the most common signs that will guide us to establish it clearly.
5 signs I have a possessive partner
1. Always control what I do and with whom I interact.
When your partner tries by all means to be aware of everything or almost everything you do, that is, he wants to know at all times where you are, who you are with, what you are doing, etc. For example, if he notices that it takes longer than usual to get home, he gets angry and / or questions you over and over about what you did and demands explanations about your delay, he calls you to make sure that you are actually doing what You told him that you would do, he wants to know perfectly everything about the people with whom you relate, he even prohibits you or gets angry if you have contact with someone he does not like, among other things.
2. You don't feel free to make your own decisions.
If you feel limited because for everything you want to do, you feel that you have to ask for the approval of your partner. For example, you want to start practicing a new sport, you are determined to do it, however the fact that you think that your partner has to give you approval so that you can start stops you, because if you do not have their approval, you even feel obliged to never try.
3. You feel manipulated.
Another sign that your partner is being possessive of you is that you have the feeling that he is manipulating you emotionally, that always, for whatever reason, you end up changing your mind and doing what she (he) wants even if you have previously been safe (a) of what you wanted. A very common example of manipulation would be when you have not seen your friends for a long time, you want to see them and go out with them, you tell your partner, they do not tell you directly that they do not want you to go but they start saying things to you to make you feel bad about your decision, for example it can make you believe that you are selfish, even if you really are not and you end up staying home.
4. He wants you to be with him (her) all the time.
He does not like you to see your friends and even your family, he prefers that all your time is dedicated to him (her). He gets angry if he knows you want to see other people important to you and pretends that he (she) is the only important person in your life.
5. Is extremely jealous.
He is jealous of everything or almost everything, he even gets jealous of your family and friends. It is easy for any type of situation to make you a scene of jealousy, try to be in contact with you all the time and watch what you do to make sure that you are not cheating on another person, continuously check your social networks and / or check your phone to make sure there is nothing suspicious, etc.
As I mentioned before, these are the most common attitudes that a possessive person tends to adopt in their relationship. However, from these, others of greater intensity may arise and it is necessary to learn to detect them and from there begin to take certain measures that will help us to get out of this situation. In the following article I am going to give you some tips that will be very useful so that you know how to avoid and improve this situation with your partner.
Until next time!
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Psychologist Marissa Glover Aguilar
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