To prepare for a negotiation you have to have a good strategy, know how to exchange variables, defend the most important variables and above all manage time well.
We agree? We will stop along the way and reflect on the agreements.
Let's refresh the memory. Have you noticed the number of agreements we reach on a day-to-day basis and many of them are not raised as a negotiation? Some because we are not interested but others, are we interested?
We all know that to negotiate is to reach a satisfactory agreement between two opposing parties, who want to bring positions closer and are willing to concede something for something. It looks like a game… and it sure IS. A game is almost always competitive, whenever you play you want to win, in negotiations it doesn't have to be that way. There are competitive negotiations, like any game, but there are also cooperative negotiations, a game in which both parties feel they have won.
And why do I say it is a game?
If we look closely, we will realize that deep down we all know the negotiation game but many times we need to stop to think and plan a strategy. A strategy that suits us, analyzed and designed to achieve our goal.
The game
Let's discover the game and the negotiation. When we are going to negotiate two parties meet in one place, it is the well-known negotiation table (in the game it is a board). At that negotiation table, we start from an initial confrontational situation composed of a set of variables that must be managed and exchanged, and manage to bring our initial position closer to the position of the other party with patience and for as long as it takes. at the same time that it does too.
The chips
The variables of the negotiation are in the game the chips (if you move one, I move another, and so on, without haste), we are moving the position of the variables (chips) on the negotiation table (board); we are approaching positions. We both know, or should know, all the variables and their value for both. Thus, when we exchange the variables, let's do it for others of the same or higher value if we want to win, or for ones of a lower value if it is for a strategy prepared in advance.
Now we are going to play and move the game to negotiation. I propose that you consider negotiation as a chess game where the parties must seek a competitive or cooperative solution (end the game) (all chess games are competitive, however, negotiations can also be cooperative). The board is the negotiating table, the variables are the black and white pieces, there are many pawns, there are bishops, rooks, knights and there are the queen and the king. Remember that you have to know all the variables for possible exchanges.
The match
The game begins and we begin to approach positions: the negotiation begins. The first thing we do is bring the pawns, variables of little value, closer to prepare the ground and take positions; we approach positions in the negotiation. As the game progresses, variables of greater value begin to come into play: knights, bishops and rooks. The game continues and the main variables to negotiate come into play, the ones with the highest value: the queen and the king. This is when, knowing all of them and their position on the board, we must be careful with what is exchanged and with the pieces that move because we can lose some without realizing it.
When they are all in play, positions are constantly changing, new situations appear on the board, all the pieces are moved from one side to the other; alternatives are sought.
The moment of the exchange arrives. This is where you start to see who knows how to play the game better; the important thing is to protect the main variable (king) with the others. In the negotiation, you have to exchange variables for variables, but the fundamental thing is to know what to exchange. Good negotiators exchange their pawns for knights, rooks, or bishops. The ideal would be to exchange it for the king or queen.
The end of the game
The game continues, the exchange continues and we arrive at a final position on the board: possible solutions to the game; possible solutions to negotiation.
Checkmate
The game ends and there is an agreement, there is an end; It may be that white or black wins, it will depend on the strategy that each one has taken. In these cases there will be win / lose or lose / win situations of the negotiation, in both, one of the parties has better defended their interests and both have cooperated (they have brought positions closer together), but one has done better than the other.
The one that best defended their interests has won and the other has lost.
We are in tables
The tables in chess, the win / win situation (the competitive ones will understand it as a lose / lose, the chess players feel frustration when reaching this situation if we play with white, for these it will be a lose / lose, but in the negotiation is the win / win solution). If we look at it from the point of view in which the two parties have exchanged variables and end up in a situation that neither earns more than the other, both have given equally. The two have changed their starting position, have brought positions closer, have exchanged variables and have reached an end, but both still have chips on the board that they have not exchanged.
The value of these variables is important to both of them, so important that they have defended them to the end and are not willing to concede them.
The tables in the negotiation is one of the possible solutions, it depends on how we are willing to defend our interests.
It is the most difficult situation to achieve in negotiations: the most difficult games, the longest, where the parties carefully prepare and plan their strategy, grant variables and manage times well. Imagine that you want to play a game of chess that from the beginning you want to end in a draw, in a certain way you will stop being competitive and you will become cooperative.
For a win / win solution to occur in negotiations, both parties must defend their interests and cooperate. Unlike in chess, you defend your interests and you want to win.
If we analyze the draw from the point of view of negotiation, we understand them as possible solutions to an agreement in which both parties feel like they are winners, although the draw in chess could make one of the parties feel losing (White).
I don't like the game, I don't want to continue playing
There are times when the competitive nature leads us to make the decision to abandon the game; we get angry and do not want to continue playing. Games in which one of the parties withdraws from the negotiation, does not want to reach an agreement; in this case the situation will lose / lose of the negotiation: both lose, the game is broken. Chess players also feel like losers when we don't finish the game.
As a reflection, to prepare for a negotiation you have to have a good strategy, know how to exchange variables, defend the most important variables and above all manage the times well.
For the following games I recommend that you meditate before if you want to play or not, if yes, dedicate time, reflection and preparation.
- Prepare the starting moves. Know which tokens you should exchange and why. Attack and defend yourself from attacks. Visualize the game at all times and do not do anything you do not have in mind; if necessary, take your time. Play and enjoy the game: you always learn more by playing than by watching.
Get up and… start the game: life is a continuous negotiation. If you are interested in something, play.
