If we attend to studies on personality and its ego states, we know that every person has three ego states (Parent, Adult and Child) and depending on the state that generally operates at a given moment, the person's behavior will be different.
We often think that a negotiator, before any type of negotiation, has to act generally from his Adult state, this does not mean that he is a cold and calculating negotiator but that he integrates the three states considering his beliefs, emotions and thoughts. Many times you will issue rules or judgments in certain negotiations and other times a friendly smile or a warm recognition of your work to the parties involved in the negotiation.
Now, if the energy of the personality is more fixed in one state of the ego than in another, the behaviors are stereotyped, the performance is typical, characteristic, and denotes a certain style of action in the negotiations that is directly related to the style. manager's direction.
According to the state of the operant personality and based on the studies of M.JAMES, a relationship can be established between the state of the personality, management style and negotiating style.
|
Functional state of the predominant ego |
Management style |
Negotiating style |
| Critical Parent | Critical manager | Critical Negotiator Collaborative
Critical Negotiator Competitive |
| Nutritious Father | Paternal directive | Collaborative
Paternal Negotiator Competitive Paternal Negotiator |
| Adult | Executive Calculator | Negotiator Collaborative
Calculator Negotiator Competitive Calculator |
| Submissive Adapted Child | Complacent Manager | Complacent Negotiator Collaborative
Complacent Negotiator Competitive |
| Rebel Adapted Child | Peleón Manager | Collaborative
Bully Negotiator Competitive Bully Negotiator |
| Natural or Free Child | Imaginative Manager | Collaborative
Imaginative Negotiator Competitive Imaginative Negotiator |
Negotiating styles according to the type of negotiation (collaborative or competitive) and management style conform to typical forms of managerial behavior. They are therefore archetypes of functioning in which a person can rarely fit fully, however they are useful, because they allow us to approach reality in a simple way.
There are no "good" or "bad" states, better or worse, however behavior can be positive, constructive, promoting cooperation and harmonious interpersonal relationships; collaborative negotiator style. Or, on the contrary, action from any state can be negative, causing communication and relationship conflicts; competitive negotiating style.
A good negotiator must know how to handle all the styles of the Self, adapting to each situation, interlocutor and moment.
We can speak of different negotiators according to their managerial style and their predominant ego state.
Critical Negotiator:
Negotiators focused on action, what they are interested in is that the other party acts according to the principles that he imposes, they pretend to be right and that an agreement is reached accepting the other party the alternative that they propose.
- The Collaborative Critical Negotiator. It focuses on the importance of the topic to be discussed, it requires accuracy of compliance with the topics discussed. Find enough information before making decisions. Your behavior conveys security to the other party. They like to deal with difficult negotiations. They focus on what's important and get straight to the point. They accept fringes (variables of little value for both parties) in the negotiations since they consider it trivial things, the important thing for them is to reach agreements on the variables to be dosed (main topic of the negotiation). They are strict with the negotiated process, they like to go step by step but without wasting time.
- The Competitive Critical Negotiator. Negotiates prejudiced, disparages the other party. One of its fundamental characteristics is being very authoritarian, its decisions are inflexible. In negotiations what he says is the best solution. Its manifestations tend to destroy the self-esteem of others. They do not accept innovative points of view since for him if a solution has always been good, why change it. They do not listen to the other party, they always think that he is the one who knows the most about the subject.
Parental Negotiator:
Negotiators who are interested in fulfilling the pacts and acting in accordance with the solutions that he imposes. It is based on affective behaviors. His way of solving the negotiations instead of being taxed, he dresses them as if they were proposals.
- The Collaborative Paternal Negotiator: Supports, advises the other party by indicating how to do things, knows how to listen and likes to create a climate of cordiality. Encourage the other party to reach a satisfactory agreement. He looks to her to develop his maximum potential as a negotiator and he feels comfortable if he also wins his interests. She knows how to listen and is constantly giving feedback. It makes the other party feel understood and motivated to reach an agreement.
- The Competitive Paternal Negotiator: Prevents the other party from developing all his qualities as a negotiator. He insists that things be done his way. It favors attitudes of dependence, that the other party feels guided by it in the course of the negotiation.
Calculator Negotiator:
Their behavior is aimed at achieving the previously set objectives. It is based on reasoned agreements: constantly calculate, add and subtract, multiply and divide products, numbers and people.
- Collaborative Calculator Negotiator: You like to be flexible, you don't care if the agreement is reached in one way or another, what you want is to reach an agreement. He is cold when making a decision and carefully weighs the pros and cons of the potential deal. Values the personal relationship and the human factor of the negotiating parties, likes to create a climate of trust. He expresses his arguments clearly, he does not repeat himself, he does not provide information other than what is necessary. You like to clearly define the objectives of the negotiation. Their efficiency and ability to reach agreements make them very valuable as negotiators.
- Competitive Calculator Negotiator: It focuses the negotiation on economic and material data, forgetting the human factor of the relationship between the parties. It is cold, devoid of any affection or sympathy. Personal aspects are not dealt with in negotiations for him.
Willing Negotiator:
Negotiators who like to please the parties, avoid confrontation. They favor the personal relationship, having a great weight when reaching an agreement.
- The Collaborative Compliant Negotiator: Aware that any negotiation requires a process and phases that must be met. He is very patient and handles difficult negotiations very well. You like to be kind, courteous, and considerate of the other party.
- The Competitive Complacent Negotiator: Refuses to enter into dealing with complicated issues, does not like to face the reality of problems. The agreements that are usually reached are partial or superficial, giving a short-term result and having to negotiate the same issue again after a short period of time. He is not in favor of innovative solutions for fear of what may happen when the possible outcome is not known with certainty. He usually stalls when he is asked to deal with difficult subjects.
Peleón Negotiator:
Demanding negotiators with the issues to be discussed, sometimes aggressive and challenging.
Collaborative Peleón Negotiator: Loyal to the part he represents defends it above all against possible competitors. You are looking for success and you like to face difficult negotiations. Respect the rules of the game and do not use negotiating tactics that manipulate the other party. You like to share information with the other party in order to reach the best possible agreement.
Competitive Bully Negotiator: Seeks success in negotiations and if necessary uses negotiating tactics that manipulate the other party. They are hostile and aggressive, very competitive. They seek to win at all costs, they feel comfortable making win-lose agreements.
Imaginative negotiator:
It is characterized by its emotional, changeable and creative attitude.
- Collaborative Imaginative Negotiator. They are usually spontaneous and creative. In negotiations, they tend to openly express what they think or feel about the issue at hand. They innovate and seek new solutions for any negotiation, regardless of the issue at hand. They are good negotiators for win-win agreements.
- Competitive Imaginative Negotiator. He closes in on his idea and it is difficult for the other party to understand and accept it, this makes the other party feel uncomfortable in the course of the negotiation. He does not like to deal with fringes in the negotiation, he considers them unimportant. Once an agreement is reached on the main issues, the negotiation is concluded.
The ability to recognize what state of the ego is operating at a given moment in the negotiator, both of ourselves, and of the other party with whom we are communicating, is a skill that will be valuable if we want to avoid communication breakdown and a satisfactory agreement is reached for both parties
Keep in mind that no ego state is better. A complete functioning of the person will be one in which you have access to all parts of the personality.
According to the definition of Integrated Adult by James and Jongeward, we can say that a good negotiator is one who has an honest sense and trust in others typical of the collaborative critical negotiator, while at the same time possessing adequate intelligence to solve problems and make decisions. typical of the collaborative calculating negotiating style, and knows how to express his feelings and emotions as he feels them without harming others, typical of the complacent, quarrelsome and imaginative collaborative negotiator. Adapting competitive styles according to the negotiations that are taking place.
