Self-esteem is a concept that depends on multiple factors, and has various components. For this reason, there are numerous ways you can be injured over time. Self-esteem can be affected when the self-concept is altered, or when our body image is attacked, or when things have happened to us that have affected our self-confidence. Also, when we have not felt valued, which leaves us with a feeling that what we do is not important.
Just as self-esteem takes time to develop, it takes time to affect yourself. Usually we do not feel little for an isolated event, but for a series of circumstances, thoughts, beliefs, among other things, that occur in the course of our lives, and accumulate to finally deteriorate that self-love.
One of the most relevant factors that affects self-esteem is parents. They can be an important source of security, trust and love, but if for some reason they are not, self-esteem is damaged. For example, if one of your parents was absent, or if you were not taken into account, you probably felt that you were not an important person, or that nobody accepted you because you were a hindrance. Or maybe they were present, but all the time they told you that you were useless, that you were useless or that you did not do anything right; This inevitably greatly affected your concept of yourself and your future results. And worse still, if there was physical, verbal or psychological abuse in your home, you could grow with a supremely damaged self-esteem.
Other external factors that have a lot to do with the development of your self-esteem are the comments and attitudes of other people. Teachers have a great influence, since they are in charge of not only teaching us, but also discovering and reinforcing our talents and abilities. If your teachers criticized you all the time, telling you that you couldn't do anything right, this makes you grow up with an altered image of yourself. Also, the behavior of friends or fellow students or the neighborhood have a lot to do with whether they rejected you or if you were widely accepted.
Your previous experiences and traumatic events also have a lot to do with developing your self-esteem. If everything in your life was going well, you generally grow up feeling that the world is safe, that you can have confidence, and that you have people. But if you had an event that marked your life, or a series of repetitive traumas such as a disharmonious family, living in a violent place or being constantly assaulted, you are more likely to value your life less.
Your personal achievements also influence. If you are a person who has had great achievements, who has done what he has set out to do, it is easier to trust yourself. But if you've had multiple failures, that invariably affects the way you look. For example, if in childhood and adolescence you were constantly rejected by the opposite gender, that marks, and may even affect your self-image. Or if they did not accept you for any detail of yours, too. Or if you had repetitive school failures.
However, one of the most powerful factors that damage self-esteem over the years does not refer to what happens to you outside, or the misconduct of others, but what happens inside you. If you feed a very frustrating internal dialogue, creating negative paradigms about yourself, minimizing your achievements, criticizing yourself in a scathing way, surely your self-esteem will lose strength over time.
It is not very clear how these different factors interact. There are also elements of your own that make you gradually lose that love for you, and that you do not believe when you are told that you are full of gifts and talents, and that you have the potential to impact society. All these aspects are mixed so that you finally live with a lesser concept of yourself and your achievements.
I invite you to take a look at the virtual book "Effective Strategies to Strengthen Self-esteem", where you will find many ways and considerations in the task of working for your self-esteem. Your life will not be the same after reading and applying what this book says.
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If you want to know more about strategies to improve self-esteem, or if you want to work on you in a more personalized way through face-to-face psychotherapeutic consultations or by Skype, click here.
I wish you the greatest blessings.
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Guillermo Mendoza Velez
www.SaludMentalyEmocional.com
