Your quality of life will depend not only on the capabilities within you but on the way you use them.
Life stage changes
Human beings go through the four stages of life, which are childhood, youth, adulthood and old age. If we deny one, we will surely have a distorted perception of reality. Let's see how to overcome each stage.
In childhood three extremely important events happen: weaning that generates the first sensation of loss, the first duel. At that moment the exploration of the world begins. The second stage is when the child stands up and begins to take his first steps. Children's curiosity is very important, if at that stage they prohibit research, their capacity for exploratory curiosity is inhibited, much needed later. And the third and fundamental moment is, when it acquires the possibility of symbolic communication. Parents incorporate him into the world of words. If we are denied childhoodwe will lose creativity. Each stage of life has a task. Play and creativity are learned in childhood, so children who did not play enough have adjustment problems. If they do not retain the ability to play, they will not be able to creatively solve life's problems in adulthood.
Youth begins with a psychologically stormy period, puberty, which is the greatest emotional and psychological revolution that a human has throughout his life. After the hormonal earthquake, which is adolescence, the human abruptly transforms into another. As a child he becomes a young revolutionary who raises the banner of transgression. Adolescents have to be transgressors because if not, they cannot inaugurate a new story, they have to say "I am going to make the world again". Sometimes they have to break everything to start something else. This is necessary to move the wheel of history and to have a different identity from that of the parents.At this time of crisis and social transformation, there is a serious problem that arises at puberty and that is that parents and children are in a constant crisis. Therefore, it is very difficult for parents to understand their children, because adolescents are in a world that has other definitions of love, death, madness, sexuality, there is another conception and they see it in different ways. In sexuality too, there are things that the mother does not imagine because she had a different sexual world than the daughter lives today. This produces a generational fracture and that is why it is difficult to speak with adolescents, even the words are different. Therefore, if we were excessively repressed in adolescence, we will lose our rebellion.
Adults: The adult stage currently begins around the age of 30 or 35. It is at this time that the person begins to define a vital project. A couple, a family, a profession, a way of being in the world. Here begins the cycle of great decisions, the passage from courtship to family and the organization is completely different, the children appear and the family group is generated, the transgression that served to get rid of the parents and build a new identity is no longer necessary Being a transgressing adolescent is necessary, but continuing to be one as a parent is no longer functional. The activity of this cycle of life is the family, the professional role, production, work.If it is missing, things get tangled up in our personal system because the two columns with which we sustain life, are affections and work, the family serves for our internal aspects, for close ties, to feel that there is a network of support and to be able to also give support to others and the work serves for social fulfillment. If a man or a woman is kicked out of work, he is lame. Therefore, the unemployed not only lose in their daily economy, but the professional role, the schedules, the links, the sociability changes etc., it can be said that a part of life was disarmed. At this stage, feelings of demotivation appear that have more to do with the existential void. Sometimes they come to the coaching session and say:"I don't know why to live, I'm not interested in anything." "I have to start again and I don't know where" It is like the paralysis of life, because they are indeed in a difficult situation. However, I have witnessed, through my professional experience as a Coach and Therapist, that at this stage the falls can be traced and finally the adult comes out much more strengthened, assuming this stage fully and collecting experience.
Old age. In a coaching session a client told me “I was afraid of this stage that begins after I am sixty years old. However, now that I'm more or less installed in it, I realize that my life has been simplified and most of the things that used to worry me, now I think it's nonsense "-I have been left with the essentials: love, children, but I have lost my old companion ”-This age is not so bad, the subject of death is always anguish, thinking about your own or that of a friend / colleague. Fear of old age causes us to overlap it, which is considered unworthy, to hide in a nursing home because we no longer "serve anymore." In the United States there was an actress who had been very famous. I remember once in Galicia, I could see that all the grandparents were playing cards and drinking their herbal liqueur with great dignity, some young people asked them questions about fishing, history, politics. He who saw the film almost to the end, knows perfectly what it is like, and can warn others how the hand of life comes. These are the grandparents who already lived part of the film and alert us of how we can continue.In the indigenous communities of the Pacific coast there is no retirement working with them, the old men of each tribe were looking at the sea and I thought: "There is the national library"… One knew of deliveries, another of canoes, another of medicinal plants They cared for them very much, because they were the transmitters of wisdom, there was no written transmission. They had a look full of dignity like the ones I saw in Africa. There, in the life process, all stages are respected. And remember that parents who are not afraid of death make children who are not afraid of life.they cared for them very much, because they were the transmitters of wisdom, there was no written transmission. They had a look full of dignity like the ones I saw in Africa. There, in the life process, all stages are respected. And remember that parents who are not afraid of death make children who are not afraid of life.they cared for them very much, because they were the transmitters of wisdom, there was no written transmission. They had a look full of dignity like the ones I saw in Africa. There, in the life process, all stages are respected. And remember that parents who are not afraid of death make children who are not afraid of life.
The important thing is to keep growing, it is like going through different seasons. In each one you have to get off and take the other train (they are evolutionary crises). Some get off in one and stay there, they do not continue on the journey of life.When one of the evolutionary passages is not traveled, a disturbance occurs. There are people who suffer small crises at each change of life stage, sometimes, these changes are accompanied by painful processes such as a separation, a move, a mourning, the loss of a job and then we first need to internally replace each change. Coaching sessions, in many cases, are an excellent ally since the work with these vital problems is resolved in a pleasant and brief way and in most cases with success. People who are going through one stage and who simply need to re-establish their confidence and strengths, in order to move on to the next.
How to make our life stage change more enjoyable
You are closer to change, when you least try to change, that is, when you are more open to the acceptance of all aspects of your personality. Change occurs when one becomes, at each vital stage, what he is. Learning to accept ourselves is the first step to be able to change complex situations inside and outside our family system of partner or work.
Many times out of fear or ignorance, at each change of life stage we try to hold on to it, producing what are called "self-boycotts" to avoid entering the next stage, we suffer a crisis of self-confidence and we are afraid of what will come.
Support us with our own thoughts
Trust: we know that life is a choice, not something that happens to us. Many think that trusting or having faith in oneself is going to a church, practicing a religion, being spiritual, being old or leading a boring and monotonous life. Trust is the faith that one places in oneself, it is action, movement, result, life. Trust is conviction and certainty that whatever you set out to achieve will.
Quality of life your quality of life will depend not only on the capabilities within you but on the way you use them. Quality of life is not only a good diet and having basic needs satisfied is also learning to relate healthily to our system of thought. Maybe you must face failures, mistakes or wrong decisions, if you are excessively rigid with your thoughts, you will tend to crush yourself on instead of constructive learning. Remember that many of the obstacles and limits that we find are in our thoughts and that configures a reality that makes us stagnate, thus breaking the only ingredient we need to achieve each change of vital stage: self-confidence.
So do not stay alone @ with those things that happen to you, share and integrate the more you know yourself, the better your emotional management will be at each stage of change of life stage.
