In order to survive, the human being needs to group and relate in order to face the great challenge of staying alive, overcoming adversities and reaching a decent level of subsistence in community.
This relationship is possible thanks to its innate ability to communicate and reach satisfactory agreements for peaceful coexistence.
This communication is more effective as it is more aware and adjusted to the needs and ways of being and acting of those who are related. What does it mean to have conscious communication? It means realizing, realizing what we say, when, how, where, why and why do we say it? When communication is not carried out in a conscious way, much of what we express is received by our interlocutor differently from how we want it. This reduces our influence on others, limits the degree of cooperation we receive, and consequently makes our lives less efficient.
If communication is not conscious, then it is unconscious or automatic.
In that case, we no longer express ourselves with previously chosen words, tones of voice, gestures, postures, and movements and under criteria of satisfaction and convenience, but through forms and styles governed by habits, customs, traditions, and trends that we learned during the parenting and socialization process. Developing communicational awareness is extremely important to improve relationships and through them, the quality of our daily existence.
Everything we say verbally carries a content, an intention, an emotion, and a type of "non-verbal" support or context. How many people know with certainty what messages they are transmitting, what intention their expressions have, what emotion accompanies their emissions, what their bodies say and how their words are received? Surely very few.
Our communication can translate responsibility or victimhood, emotional security or insecurity, respect or inconsideration, proximity or withdrawal, love or heartbreak, joy, anger, guilt or sadness, creativity or routine, patience or impatience, clarity or confusion. It all depends, mainly on what and how we express ourselves.
Anyone who wants to be a good communicator by voluntary and conscious choice will necessarily have to consider these factors and understand that much of what we blame others for is nothing but the logical and direct product of our own communication mistakes or successes.
If a woman wants to be loved, why does she choose to dress to be wanted? If a man wants to be perceived as self-confident, why does he insist on being arrogant and intimidating. One effect is sought but another is produced. The reason ?: Unconsciousness when communicating.
Sometimes we sabotage ourselves so much that there seems to be something or someone directing our lives. Ego? Subconscious? The important thing is to learn to direct our communication and to realize the hidden or contradictory messages that we share. We can activate states of apathy, antipathy, empathy or sympathy in people, depending on our communicational quality.
To improve communicational quality, we must carefully choose the words we use, the tone of voice with which we express ourselves, as well as the gestures, postures and movements we use. Even things like the clothes and accessories we wear send messages about our mood and social status. The way we manage distance (near or far) in communication speaks to our ability to set limits or to move towards greater intimacy.
The time dedicated to a conversation, the chosen place, whether you go alone or accompanied, if you arrive on foot or by car, if you use business cards or not, if you listen carefully and many other factors, reveal aspects of your personality that probably considered well guarded. We are always communicating something, because there is no way not to do it. Talking a lot, talking a little and even being silent, expresses, in a certain way, your position on the subject of conversation, shows, even in part, what you are or what you pretend to be.
You cannot have a quality life without quality relationships, and you cannot have quality relationships without quality communication. And what is quality communication if not conscious communication in which we achieve harmony and through it productivity?
